These few days all my friends kept keeping me company... and i really appreciate it... Some of them know, most of them do not know, but they knew that i was feeling down, and they tried many ways to cheer me up. Thank you so much... Thanks for all ur company, thanks for the little messages, thanks for the phone calls, thanks for the little gifts and thanks for the encouragements...
Many said i tried too hard to act strong, many asked me why did i not want to talk it out... they said i bottled too much of my feelings... many asked me to cry it out, to share my sadness, to let go, to forget...
I'm sorry i cant talk it out, because saying it over again means feeling the hurt all over again, to be reminded of the past, of the betrayal, of the pain...
But slowly and slowly, the reality hits me, I know what i m doing, I know what i want. I cannot stop the memories and pain from surfacing, but I can choose what I want to remember... I can choose what I want to think about. I can choose to forget about him...
And I still believe that valuable lessons can be learnt in every failed relationship. So not all is lost right! Like i learnt that no one is irreplaceable in any situation, no one will change for anyone, no one will die because of anyone and it is highly possible that one will commit the same mistake that he committed in the previous relationship... i also learnt that a lie will lead to another, and another, and another, and to a man, the girl will never be his one and only, cuz it is highly possible that he has many, many others... and even if you think you are the best and you have given him the best you can offer, to him it never really meant anything at all... and no woman will want to share her loved one with another, and the man also cant love two or more women at the same time...
Love is a weird feeling... it will come suddenly, but the scary part is that it will go as sudden as it came. He will just have no feelings for you suddenly, and he will do the most scary things a woman can imagine. And usually you will feel helpless, and you will question yourself. What happened to the man that you once loved so much? Why did he suddenly treat you this way? What happened to the love you all once shared? What was he thinking when he did that to you?
Love suddenly turned to betrayal... like a bubble, burst and disappeared.
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